Oh, what a joy it is to see the ASUS ROG Ally facing some early hiccups! Just a day into its launch, and already the brave pioneers who embraced this technological marvel are reporting issues left and right. The grand discovery was made on the esteemed /r/ROGALLY subreddit, which remained steadfast even through the planned boycott (such dedication!). User HZ4C, a true hero, shared an enlightening post about joystick deadzones plaguing the ASUS ROG Ally. They even had the audacity to suggest that this might affect most, if not every, single device. How marvelous!
But fear not, dear enthusiasts, for the problem might not lie within the hardware after all. HZ4C, our knight in shining armor, suspects it could be a software quandary related to ArmouryCrateSE. Isn’t that wonderful news? A software issue can always be easily resolved with a simple update, unlike the dreaded hardware complications that would haunt us eternally. HZ4C diligently cross-referenced their findings with other ASUS ROG Ally playtests, and lo and behold, a few reviewers did acknowledge the problem. Oh, the oversight of many others who missed this glaring flaw!
Our valiant champion then embarked on a quest to test the deadzones of the ASUS ROG Ally. They discovered a mysterious “hidden” deadzone lurking even at 0%. How thrilling! After some Steam Big Picture mode exploration, HZ4C confirmed the existence of a default 20% deadzone. Sadly, despite their valiant efforts, no solution was found. Alas!
But fear not, my compatriots, for the ASUS ROG’s Community Manager has been informed of our plight. They have graciously promised to investigate the matter with utmost urgency. How reassuring! Some distraught souls on the Discord server have deemed this issue a “complete deal breaker.” Oh, the despair!
And on the main Reddit thread, a chorus of lamentations can be heard. “Unplayable!” cries one user. Another ponders returning their precious investment. How heartbreaking! It appears that many reviewers and product testers failed to notice this insignificant joystick deadzone quandary, as they were too busy playing games that don’t demand such delicate joystick control. But fret not, for there are now a plethora of ASUS ROG Ally adopters regretting their choices, casting longing glances at their forsaken Steam Decks.
Oh, the irony of it all! How delightful it is to witness the follies of the early adopters. Such is the adventurous path they tread, forever at the mercy of technological mishaps. We can only hope that ASUS will rectify this matter swiftly, and the devoted ASUS ROG Ally users shall once again bask in the glory of seamless joystick control. Until then, let us revel in the spectacle of disappointment and rueful reflections. What a time to be alive!
This is a snipet of the Talking In Teacups Podcast
